My Relationship Goals

My Relationship Goals as a Newlywed Wife

Goals can help in ensuring we actually do actions that will strengthen our lives. I am setting relationship goals, that will enhance my marriage in the context of my diverse fulfilling life.

Take note, I am not a psychologist. My background is in business marketing and journalism. Although I can reflect on personal experience, to see what works for me.

Continue Independent Projects

I enjoy delving into creative autonomous projects. It could be about dedicating some time on my blogs or online store. There is great freedom in doing something I have control over. These projects definitely will continue during my married life. Not only is it important to me, it is also something my husband encourages. We were both originally attracted to each other's abilities as much as our personalities.

Personal projects can be either hectic or calm. I might be rushing to a deadline on a publication or campaign for someone else. Some of my own digital work is done from the comfort of my laptop at home. Both types of pace are needed.

Daily Phone Calls During Lunch and Evenings

Chances are one of us will be out somewhere, working or being social, at lunch time and after five. We already have a routine of chatting on the phone about anything that is happening. It brings us into each other's worlds and continues communication. We also help each other to cope with stressful days. Clay is now used to only eating lunch after I have called on the phone. And a chat on the mobile is my first reaction to ending a day of work. We are together at the start and end of the day, but want to feel connected between in-person moments.

Regularly Going Out to Treat Ourselves

Simple outings can be fun. It might be a shared plate and cocktails at a local venue. Or I might find a quality movie at the cinemas. My favourite time out involves walking around a city or beach. We do something we both will enjoy, when we are emotionally and physically ready. 'Date night' should not be strictly scheduled in a way that stresses us out. Excitement will happen at the right time.

Frequent Quiet Nights In Together

We do get a bit tired after work, community events and personal travel. Our lives are filled with fruitful adventures. Then it is time to rest. Sometimes all I want is to curl up on the couch, with a DVD or Netflix, and indulge in some light snacks alongside a good glass of wine. Even just two hours of chill-out could be relaxing enough. I then tend to have more clarity of thought, a calmer energy and more creative ideas.

Constant Honesty From Both of Us

I always encourage complete transparency. My favourite line in conversation is, "What are you thinking right now?" Luckily, hubby Clay is used to willingly sharing innermost thoughts when asked. This honesty keeps us both on the same page.

There is no benefit to burying thoughts. Openness is great in a loving respectful relationship. We can help each other in our personal struggles as much as our successful triumphs. This can only happen when we understand what is happening, from both our perspectives.

Complimenting Each Other

Compliments are fun to receive. Kind words will also give us the joy of easily making each other happy. We say reminders of each other's outer beauty, inner personalities and contributions to the world. Who wouldn't want to hear positive words about themselves? Our marriage benefits from regular compliments, which are another perk of relationships.

Showing Gratitude for Life Blessings

Gratitude helps us to be thankful for the positive things throughout our lives. Anyone can be grateful for blessings. We say thoughts of gratitude out loud, to remind ourselves of what is going well. It could be thankfulness for home, career moves, fun friends or interesting hobbies. This strategy for positive thinking will lift my mood at any moment.

Adaptation for an Evolving Committed Relationship

These strategies have proven to be beneficial in my relationship. Perhaps they might be equally useful for you, dear readers. Constant evolution is important for relationships, partnerships and marriages. I believe in change over time. People evolve as human beings. As such, new strategies can add greater depth to relationships and life.

Melanie and Clay at their wedding.


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