Peaceful open letter about Apple chargers

Dear Apple,

Please stop changing your phone chargers. 

I realise you make money when we replace our incompatible chargers. But I really believe you would be making money anyway.     

As a slightly flawed human being, I am as prone to forgetting my charger as the next person. But I am also quite prepared. I try to keep a spare charger in my handbag, at home, at work, and so on. It is better to have too many than too few. And I am happy to replace them. The cost is worth the peace of mind.   

I am willing to sacrifice the entire bag of compatible connectors, simply because you require it. Now I need a new adaptor to use my Apple HDMI adaptor. The cute pink charger, from the convenience store, will go to charger-Heaven (it’s like doggy heaven and kitty heaven). But this replacement will take time, something which is rarely available.

As a new owner of an iPhone 6, your new type of charger is a sudden addition to my to do list. I am thankful for the one charger you so kindly supplied in the bundled box for my new telephone. However, that is only one out of the minimum chargers I need.

Sure, I will end up spending money on the backups soon enough. But I barely have time for this shopping, as a severely time-poor hipster employed grad student and social butterfly. This shopping is another thing on the to do list.

Now I need to drag myself through a shopping mall to the nearest hi fi store. I will pass an array of staff who specialise in something else, besides phone cables. Sorry, the security guard and DVD salespeople cannot help me. I need to find a specialist who can save my phone from malnutrition. That is one way to fix this dilemma in one morning.

Alternatively, I could visit the Apple store; and compete for attention with the cult of Apple worshippers. Which salesperson handles phone accessories? Sorry iPhone and iPad salespeople, sorry Genius Bar workers, I need to find someone who can help with accessories. A voyage takes ten minutes, to wade through the crowd and up the stairs to the Apple shrine; which offers chargers. Hopefully I would be out by lunch time, or before my beloved iPhone dies of starvation.

  

Apple, I love you dearly. Your iCloud runs my life, the way a parent watches and guides a child. That is a story for another day. But please, don’t take up my morning again. Don’t change your chargers and cable ports. Thank you Apple.